An unusual tale at their usual spot..

Grey.

It was a grey afternoon, around four-ish, just perfect monsoon afternoon, with no trace of sun. I hate monsoons, but anyway, this is how the story begins. So, coming back to the grey afternoon; they were at their regular place, seated in their regular spot, side by side. The place looked gloomy and dull, of course the bright green contrasting well with the browns and the greys. The pathways were grey, just a bit lighter shade than the sky, the water in the river was a mix of brown and grey, and the seating was also grey. So basically it was all grey around them. But somehow for them, they had a tiny bubble around, a pink one, which was fresh and full of energy. There was something about them that looked very different from the rest of the people there. They looked fresh and abundantly in love.

So, as I mentioned before, they were seated next to each other. The way they were sitting sort of gave a feeling of cose; it was such a warm sight. Their arms tangled into each others, and legs too. They were so into each other, it seemed as if they didn't care about anyone or anything around them. As afternoon started getting closer to evening, the rush of people on the walkway started increasing. That was when he felt a little unease, it could be seen. And felt too. He distanced himself a bit from her, de-tangling his arms and legs from her. He started looking here and there on either sides wondering why there was such rush in-spite of it being a Monday evening. It was just a little later that he realized the people whose presence he was wondering about, and that bothered him a bit, were there for their evening walks. In today's world where everybody is running, it has become a necessity for people to at least brisk walk every evening. Looking at the visitors and wondering about their presence, he was so deeply lost into his own thoughts, that he almost completely forgot about her. And when he looked at her on his left, she was staring at him. She looked him in the eye, so intensely as if trying to find an answer to his sudden behavioral change. And she did find an answer. She saw the unease in his eyes. She knew him well enough to read his emotions just by looking into his hazel, almost cat-like, eyes. Many times she would simply keep staring at those two wide, clear dots that were his eyes. She loved the color.

Looking at his unease for touch in public, she kept her feeling restrained. She kept a distance from him as she knew he was not used to display of any kind of affection in public. She knew it would take some time for him to be free from all of that, and she was willing to give him whatever it needed to soothe him, comfort him. But like him she too wondered, not really wondered, but there was a different expression in her eyes, as to what were so may people doing there on a Monday evening. It was a mix of anger and surprise and wonder; but it was closer to anger. She clearly looked frustrated. She was enjoying her time with him, just before all those people appeared from nowhere and interrupted them. She'd wanted the time to stay forever, she didn't want it to end. But to her disappointment, there had to be a pause in their time.

She was waiting for the evening to grow darker, the darkest shade of grey. Because that would bring him back at ease, flushing out all the unease from his system. She eagerly waited for him to touch her, and hold her by her waist, as tight as a child holds on to the swing when he goes round on the merry-go-round. She waited for him to swing her in front of him and then peck on her cheek. She waited for the real him, the one who he was when he would be only with her; caring and passionately in love with her. She was the only one who could bring him to his real self.

Soon, the sky started changing its color, growing a bit darker with every passing minute, and her heart started beating faster with each passing second. Gradually, darkness took in and the evening turned almost into night, with the darkest shade of grey. As the sky started getting darker, his unease was slipping out of him and he was getting closer and closer to her. That's when she almost a skipped a beat. Her heart started pounding so fast it seemed it was going to jump out from her chest. She felt excited and happy and a bit nervous too. Everything inside her was racing at an enormous speed, one she had never experienced before. She was baffled, yet excited for what was to come. And right then, just as she had expected and imagined, he pulled her right in front of him with a gust of energy, held her so tight (just as she had wanted him to - a child holding on to the swing), she felt she would choke, and then left a peck on her lips. That was something she hadn't imagined or expected he would do. It took her by surprise. It took her a moment to gather herself, to come back to ground. She felt like she was already flying somewhere. But the way she felt was weird. Not weird exactly, but it was weird. She didn't know how to explain the feeling. But with that strange, weird feeling, she also felt something else. A feeling of strong desire. She liked the way his lips stroked hers; she loved it actually. And she wanted more of it. She didn't know how to act or how to ask for more. Her thoughts were vivid, moving to and fro whether she should make a move or wait for him to make the first move. But then she thought he had already made his move; and maybe now he wanted her to make the move. After all the juggling going on in her mind, brushing every thought away, she finally made a move by pushing her lips against his. And, closing their eyes, they indulged into something that was out of this world; and soon both of them slipped back into their bubble, that was turning from the lightest shade of pink to red to the darkest shade of crimson. They went into a state of trance in which both of them were swinging with joy, flowing with what surrounded them.

Once again, her heart won over her mind and this time she felt ecstatic. She felt content, and complete. She never thought anyone, or just one touch from anyone for that matter, would make that sort of impact on her. It felt to her as if the moment never ended, it felt infinite. 

Romantic relationships..

I've been in a relationship for a few years now. I see a lot of posts about how people think relationships mean having butterflies forever, your heart beating faster every time they walk into a room, cuddling with each other every night, legs intertwined, that you'd be so happy to live together that you'd sleep on a double bed with each other every night.

But it's really not like that, at least not to me.!

You stop getting butterflies when you start living together. Your heart no longer speeds up when you see them, but instead, everything calms down. When you're in a room with them, you feel calm, and secure. When you cuddle with them, you feel your heart beat slow, and the sound of their breathing carry you towards comfort. It doesn't feel like a roller coaster anymore, it feels like home. 

You don't sleep curled up with each other every night, legs twisted so tight that its hard to tell where your legs begin and theirs end.

Instead, you sleep comfortably side by side, sometimes facing different directions. But every night you find yourself scooting backwards to bump into them. You snuggle against their arm, or stroke their hair as they fall asleep. There are nights when your better half, in their sleep, reaches around you and pulls you to them, like a child with their teddy, like you are their comfort.

In the wee hours of morning before dawn breaks, when the world is blue and you see through cracked eyes, you curl into their chest and inhale their scent, before you drift back to sleep.

Kisses aren't always firey anymore. But there are so many of them now. There are cold kisses when you're eating ice cream, and there are sticky kisses over breakfast pancakes. There are "I'm leaving now" kisses, and "one more kiss before you leave" kisses. There are sleepy morning kisses before work, where you don't remember the alarm going off but instead the press of their lips against yours and that's what brings you into the day. 

There are kisses before you sleep and, "you are so sweet with the things you do" kisses. There's kisses because you treat animals so tenderly and there's "I'm glad I'm with you and not with anyone else" kisses. There's quick kisses while you're moving on the streets.

When its loud and you gravitate together, when instead of having your own personal space and their own personal space, its both of yours together, and you step into their chest to take up less area together.

You don't always text each other with confessions of love and care like you used to, because that's a given now, and you've moved on to quirky inside jokes about the life you've built together. You share looks of exasperation and amusement in public, your own little world against the outside one.

Relationships are not always a fairy tale. They're not always fireworks and sparks, at least after the start. 

But they are a quiet rhythm and hum of love and care. It is not a fire in your soul, but one in your heart, keeping you warm and comfortable, as you drowsily drift into sleep.

And I love that. 

Without any limits..

It is with him that,
I experienced,
What it means,
To love without any limits.

Be it any time, any hour,
Any day of the year,
He never fails to show,
His limitless side.
His love is without limits,
His care & his affection too.
His constant effort,
Of always trying to be there,
By my side.
I can see it,
And I feel it too,
Deep inside my heart,
I know it all.

He says he loves me,
More than I love him,
Maybe that's true,
But hey, how can I be sure?
Cuz there's no scale to measure love!!

The things he does,
For me, to me,
Are beyond anything else,
In this entire world.
The way he is,
When he's with me,
Show it all;
It shows how and how much,
Can one's love be,
For another...Limitless !!

Trenchant

You,
Never let things go unanswered for too long.
Emails, phone calls, questions.
As if you know,
Waiting is the hardest part for me. 

Rest

Rest with me for the rest of this.
That's it. Come closer.
We're here.

Juxtaposition

It scares me how hard it is to remember life before you. I can't even make the comparisons anymore, because my memories of that time have all the depth of a photograph. It seems foolish to play games of better and worse. It's simply a matter of is and is no longer.

Story of 'That' woman

She is a woman, a strong one,
Fighting with the world,
Facing all that came her way.

But deep inside her is sorrow,
A lot of it.
There are some hidden scars,
Some wounds of the past that are not healed,
All of it resides in her head. In her soul.

She is hoping and wanting to let it all go,

She wants to live happy,
She wants to fly and touch the sky.
She wants a hand, His hand,
To hold her and bring her out,
From the dark corner she's hiding herself.